Current Giveaways

None right now, check back soon!

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Drea's Review: Pet to the Tentacle Monsters!


Title: Pet to the Tentacle Monsters!
Author: Lilia Ford
Release Date: April 9th 2014
Format: Ebook
Length: Novella/56 pages
Source: Netgalley
Buy: Amazon, BN


I received this book via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Official blurb:
It’s been more than twelve years since the alien invasion wiped out much of the human population and forced those who were left into Refugee Communes. As far as Benji Tucker is concerned, a life devoted to bare survival is boring as hell. But when a stupid prank threatens to bring disaster down on the entire commune, the Galactic Enforcers show up and announce Benji is now eligible for adoption—by the invaders!

He wakes in a plain white cell to find three very different monsters determined to make him their pet.

Warning: Adult Readers Only. Contains plenty of hot, non-consensual tentacle action, including but not limited to tentacle spanking, tentacle gagging, and tentacle-sex. Quite separately, it also contains an adorable pink-rainbow-sparkle tentacle monster. Those who dislike adorable pink rainbow sparkles or hot tentacle action should definitely not read this book.

Melissa pointed this one out on Netgalley but didn't have time, so I volunteered to take one for the LilyElement team. First, a few upfront notes. The concept of tentacle porn isn't new to me because I have some warped friends, but I've never actually read anything with tentacles. I wasn't sure what to expect apart from tentacles in every hole. I'm also not a big fan of the concept. So, going into it, I was confident I wouldn't like it.

That said, it actually wasn't that bad. *gasp*

The writing isn't amazing but it's also not cringe-worthy. I didn't find myself putting the book aside because I was disgusted, irritated, or shaking my head. The hero didn't make me want to slap him with a wet fish (or an octopus?). And there is quite a bit of world building at the start to explain why there are tentacle monsters on Earth and why this human is stuck being the pet. These factors are why it gets the two stars.

I wanted to give this two and a half stars (maybe even closer to three) because it was an easy, fast read but here are the reasons why I didn't:
There wasn't any dialogue between the characters (until the very end) because...well, the "love interests" are tentacle monsters. Even though that makes sense given the concept, I like the back and forth between characters best and this has none. That made it harder for me to get into the story.

As far as this being a "hot" read as the author states in the blurb? Simply because there are tentacles going into multiple orifices doesn't make a story hot. Nor does the fact that it's non-consensual tentacle sex (tentacle rape?). There wasn't enough description of how the character felt using the five senses during any of that for me to be into it. I didn't get tingles, or shivers...I don't think Benji did either. Yes, he orgasmed and was humiliated quite a bit, and maybe some people get off on reading about that, but not me. I need the "showing" of sex rather than the "telling" of it. Thus I couldn't give this the extra star or half star because it wasn't sizzling as an erotic story ought to be.

However, the addable pink rainbow sparkle monster is, in fact, adorable.

15 comments:

  1. yeahhh... maybe not, I'm really not sure it's for me either.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol, I suspect it's targeted at a specific audience we don't fit :)

      Delete
  2. I'm amused that you read it. Thanks for subjecting yourself to tentacles :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. LOL I just read this one last night and wrote up my review for it. ::snort:: The wee pink tentacle monster was cute but yeah this one was not hot at all I didn't think. Well written overall but missed the mark with me :/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was wondering if you'd seen it! lmao

      Delete
    2. LOL yeah a blogger friend sent me the Netgalley link and, well, couldn't resist. Heh

      Delete
  4. WTF! I'm surprised Anna didn't like this, she loves monster porn :P

    Anyway, this is both hilarious and too green.. beyond green... for me. I can't! Talk about hentai-ish porn. I can't believe you read this?!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know! I love monster porn. It just didn't quite get into that so horribly bad it's good level. lol

      Delete
    2. Melissa read the hedgies. It was my turn. And she PAID for that book! The least I could do was grab this off netgalley. But yeah, like Anna says, this story wasn't so bad it was good, AND it missed the mark in terms of hotness. I mean, if you pretended the tentacles were sex toys or something...it still wouldn't have been hot. But I'm clearly not the target audience, so what do I know?

      Delete
  5. "Simply because there are tentacles going into multiple orifices doesn't make a story hot." o__O Well, in my opinion that doesn't sound/look hot in the least...WTH, seriously? Nope, not for anyone... I applaud you for getting through 56 pages of hentai-ish porn, Drea! LOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Someone has to like that sort of thing or there wouldn't be so many books & movies dedicated to it :D
      Thanks for the applause ;)

      Delete
  6. Yes! thank you...the showing of sex! ugh...lols. I'll pass...not a fan of monster porn no matter how well written. It's just not right in my book ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. whoops! Replied with the wrong account *blush*
      Here's what I said:
      lol I was trying to cut it some slack, but yeah, gotta show, show, show that sex

      Delete